Well I am at the end of my second day without smoking and needless to say, I am going slightly insane. And it seems like the universe is doing absolutely EVERYTHING in it's power to either drive me to murder someone, or start smoking again, both options that I refuse to accept.
I normally won't go into details about why I am going nuts, however today is specially, because it started off horrible.
My first main problem was while trying to sleep, I couldn't. With the constant nagging of my brain telling me to have a god damned smoke so I could fall asleep, I ended up laying down for hours to no avail. Around 3:00am however, I started getting tired and falling asleep. But my next door neighbor [lets call her Nikki, because that is her name. I wish I knew her last name so her boyfriend / baby daddy / pimp knew she was cheating on him] decided that her baby would start crying. Being the absolutely fucking amazing mother she is, she ignored her child. Because she was busy having sex with, what I can only assume is a small ego, small penis white kid who hasn't graduated his "Continuing Education" in the seven and a half years he's been trying it. However, she wasn't JUST having sex. She was having sex, while making as MUCH noise as possible to drown out the sound of her crying, SCREAM baby who kept crying and screaming even LOUDER because the poor childs mother is a slut.
So after 45 minutes of listening to this tramp fake orgasm after orgasm, she FINALLY shut the fuck up and shut her baby up so I could fall asleep. So I was able to get about 4 hours of sleep before I had to wake up. Now normally, I wake up, have a shower, eat and get a coffee then go to the bus stop for my smoke. However, this time without a smoke, I decided to leave 5 minutes later so I only had a 5 minute wait.
Now at this point, my bus runs every "15 minutes", but today, it ran ever 44 minutes. I had to wait for 44 minutes for my bus to FINALLY show up. While ugly annoying people at the bus stop smoked and were being loud. Due to this horrible mix up, I was unfortunately now stuck on a bus that had 4 buses worth the people on it, because no bus had come in almost an hour. So, without smokes, I am on a bus with loud, smelly, ugly, annoying people who feel the need to lean on me because they are tired.
This ended up leading to me thinking of ways to kill different people who were annoying me on the bus.
HOWEVER.
Good nature and self control prevailed. I was able to get through the day without any issues after that. However I am starting to notice the effect of a lack of nicotine, earlier than I was expecting. I was thinking after about a week i'd start feeling the effects of the withdrawl. Unfortunately, it is definitely coming through and it's starting to cause some issues. Most noticeably anger towards any life form that crosses my path.
Assuming the universe decides to give me a break tomorrow, I should be able to refrain from raining rage and horror down upon my college. If the universe DOES try to ruin my day again, well. I can always buy smokes and trade them for protection from Bubba in prison.
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